Ye, 'Great' Offer

Paul Weller once wrote about a mysterious 'Girl On The Phone' who seemed to know everything about him. Well Tesco may not know the size of my cock but I reckon they could have a pretty good stab at what brand of condom I might buy.

I go to Tesco often enough for them to know that I never, ever buy beer or lager.

(This may come as a shock but I rarely drink and, if I do, it definitely won't be beer or lager. I learned pretty quickly in my early drinking days that my body just flatly refuses to process those liquids, in however small amounts, in anything other than some kind of vomit/headache ratio. It may be 65%/35% one time or 45%/55% another but those would be the only two ingredients - sick and pain - the next day. I stuck to spirits in the main.)

I have a Clubcard after all so naturally I assume that every single item I have ever purchased from them, by and large, resides on a vast marketing database somewhere. After all, how else could they target my needs as a consumer with their advertising? Or their partners advertising - finance, insurance et al? How can they track who spends what on where by postcode? You know, the essentials.

So why is it then, if they look back through their records from the time I moved to Manchester (2003) and note that I have NOT ONCE bought beer or lager, that I am the lucky recipient of a £5-00 off voucher that I will never use? I'll see if my neighbour wants it.

Capitalism - its enough to turn you to drink.