Jobs For Which There Is Only One Cure #1

Project Manager This post is borne from personal experience of the last twenty years or so working in IT for two different companies, many different customers and numerous projects. My work is pretty much the same whatever - I build and configure firewalls of varying flavours on various hardware platforms. Oddly enough, the project management has always been pretty much the same - chaotic. In the last 3 working days, call it 22.5 hours, I have spent 2hrs 5mins on two conference calls where the sum total of my contribution has been four words: I've said my name. Twice. Two different projects, two different PMs. It isn't that I want to attend these things. I get the invite, roll my eyes, e-mail the PM to check my attendance is necessary and then think of the work I won't get done because I will be sat on a call listening to people talking about the work that has to get done. I mean, for fuck's sake. In response to my e-mails begging forgiveness the PM will generally say, "We might need you for something." Might. For something. Is it just me or does that sound like first degree vagueness to anyone? I blame the whole concept. According to Wikipedia, "Project management is the discipline of planning, organizing, and managing resources to bring about the successful completion of specific project goals and objectives." Contrast "specific project goals and objectives" with "might need you for something". I'm already working on your project, I already have work lined up to complete the project's goals and objectives but that isn't enough. You need me to sit and waste time talking about the work I am going to be doing. Or not as the recent case(s) might be. It's rare that a call concludes without reference to 'how urgent the work is' as well. My teeth grind as I resist the urge to state the obvious, "Well, if I wasn't on this call I would be getting on with the work." Scroll further down the Wikipedia page and you come to "History of Project Management" and here is where we begin to understand the true nature of the beast. "Until 1900 civil engineering projects were generally managed by creative architects and engineers themselves." Really!? You do surprise me. People managed to complete work projects, whether big or small, in conjunction with each other, by using their own creativity and communicating. And they did it themselves. They project managed themselves. So all those Dark Ages castles, those medieval churches, hell, even the country houses of the landed gentry were completed by people using their own initiative to communicate and co-ordinate their ideas and plans to get the job done. And so it was from the dawn of humanity until the middle of the last century when "The 1950s marked the beginning of the modern Project Management era. Project management became recognized as a distinct discipline arising from the management discipline." And this seems, to me, to be pretty much where it went tits up. Big business in the post-war era needed jobs for a lot of guys who had just come back from trying to kill each other. Couple that with the consumer boom apparent in the States, and elsewhere shortly after, and a layer of middle managers is created whose sole purpose is to be 'Yes' men to the senior managers while achieving very little productive work. Sorry I forgot, they also arrange conference calls - lots of 'em. And what do middle managers need to keep them busy? That's right: project management. A whole slew of principles and techniques that crept out of the woodwork - Critical Chain Project Management, Agile Project Management, PRINCE2 - to slap a name on something that workers had been doing quite happily amongst themselves for centuries.

Zig Zag Mar 1984 - Elephant Talk & Paul Weller

Dave Chapple At The Right To Work Conference

Dave Chapple of the National Shop Stewards Network at the Right To Work conference last Saturday:

The rest of the conference is on YouTube thanks to Reel News

The Right To Work conference workshops are now online too.

Masters Of War

Masters Of War Come you masters of war You that build all the guns You that build the death planes You that build the big bombs You that hide behind walls You that hide behind desks I just want you to know I can see through your masks You that never done nothin' But build to destroy You play with my world Like it's your little toy You put a gun in my hand And you hide from my eyes And you turn and run farther When the fast bullets fly Like Judas of old You lie and deceive A world war can be won You want me to believe But I see through your eyes And I see through your brain Like I see through the water That runs down my drain You fasten the triggers For the others to fire Then you set back and watch When the death count gets higher You hide in your mansion As young people's blood Flows out of their bodies And is buried in the mud You've thrown the worst fear That can ever be hurled Fear to bring children Into the world For threatening my baby Unborn and unnamed You ain't worth the blood That runs in your veins How much do I know To talk out of turn You might say that I'm young You might say I'm unlearned But there's one thing I know Though I'm younger than you Even Jesus would never Forgive what you do Let me ask you one question Is your money that good Will it buy you forgiveness Do you think that it could I think you will find When your death takes its toll All the money you made Will never buy back your soul And I hope that you die And your death'll come soon I will follow your casket In the pale afternoon And I'll watch while you're lowered Down to your deathbed And I'll stand o'er your grave 'Til I'm sure that you're dead Bob Dylan - from "The Freewheelin' Bob Dylan" - Copyright ©1963; renewed 1991 Special Rider Music

Desert Island Discs

I imagine my thoughtful pose hasn't changed much since this picture was taken.

The venerable Walker has had a bit of a thing lately for Desert Island Discs over at Burning Aquarium, well 2 posts - one for Morrissey's selection and one for the mighty John Peel's. Quite how Peely manage to select 8 tracks I'll never know but if he can do it then, by damn, so can I. Plus, I kind of told Walker I would. Me and my big mouth.

Cue much chin resting in hand and looking thoughtful while I try to dredge the memory banks for ideas. Mrs H and I had a discussion about it, while I procrastinated in the background of my brain, and between us we decided that any tracks chosen would have to have a certain resonance. That is, a personal attachment arising out of a significant memory or an emotional attachment not necessarily bestowed by times gone past but nonetheless important. I think most of these fall into the former. I also had to choose songs that I would never tire of hearing lest I drive myself insane on that remote Pacific island.

Anyway here we go:

1. The Cure - Charlotte Sometimes

Absolutely worshipped this song as a Goth in my formative years and, having only relatively recently read the book, I s'pose I still do. I will also never forget the eager anticipation and monumental let-down I experienced on receiving the video singles collection - Standing On A Beach - and waiting for, and then wincing through, the accompanying video. It's awful. Robert Smith said he nearly cried the first time he saw it. I know how he feels.


2. Michael Nyman - Memorial

Nyman dedicated this work to the Juventus fans that died at Heysel but I heard it first when watching the Peter Greenaway film The Cook, The Thief, His Wife & Her Lover. My girlfriend of the time and I went to see it at The Cameo in Edinburgh. I'll warn you - it isn't a romantic comedy. As I recall there is a shot pretty early on in the film of someone being forced to eat dog shit, not in close-up mind, and a few people started walking out. It was their loss. The film is brilliant and so is this piece of music.


3. Nirvana - Dive

In the early 90's I was working as a BT engineer and my rota was such that I had every 2nd Friday off. I also had a very tall mate called Mark who played the drums in a couple of bands. I can passably play rhythm guitar of the simple bar chord variety and, is there no beginning to my talents you cry, I can sing a tune along as well. Mark had the rehearsal space, the drums and the amps. I had my own electric guitar and a steady supply of hash so many a Friday would drift past with us thrashing out Nirvana tunes on guitar, drums and vocals only (I like to think we inspired The White Stripes). God I miss doing that.


4. Joy Division - Insight

This one is pure indulgence to the depression illness. If Mrs H hears Joy Division on at any time she knows it's a bad one. And for the lyrics: "Guess your dreams always end, They don't rise up - just descend, But I don't care any more, I've lost the will to want more"


5. The Smiths - What She Said

Andy introduced me to The Smiths around 1985/6 I think it was and at first I didn't get it. But when I did, they were unstoppable and Morrissey could do very little wrong. This is also by way of penance for the time I deliberately knocked his sandwiches into the sand, in retaliation for him accidentally knocking my coke over, on a primary school trip to South Queensferry. He cried and I have never forgiven myself.


6. Otis Redding - These Arms Of Mine

If you don't love Otis Redding then you don't have soul. Simple as.


7. The Four Tops - Wak Away Renee

Surprisingly for The Four Tops this wasn't a Holland-Dozier-Holland number. It's a cover of a song originally written by Michael Brown, of The Left Banke, when he was 16! My love of Motown stems from my sisters brief dalliance with the early 80's Mod revival. She would be playing The Jam, The Chords, Secret Affair and the rest along with a selection of Motown classics. I refer to it as a 'dalliance' though as within a few years she was buying Whitney Houston, Madonna and all manner of SAW tripe. I like to think she set my musical taste on a far preferable trajectory to the one she subsequently chose. This one's for her as, despite our closeness for most of the 80s, we rarely speak now.


8. Crass - I Ain't Thick (It's Just A Trick)

An anarchist anti-manifesto in the space of 4½ minutes of punk invective. Fucking genius.


The password for all the 7z files is the usual one - c4ctusm0uth.

Dear God, Please Can You Fix It For Me...

A picture of the Tree of Hope outside the church opposite my house.

Has there ever been a more passive, or futile, way of trying to achieve change than by prayer?

Right To Work Conference

I went to the Right To Work Conference in Manchester today, held in the Central Hall on Oldham Street. Got there nice and early, well 10-ish, so that I could register in plenty of time and meet up with a few colleagues from Fujitsu to discuss our approach to the workshops to be held. Thankfully there were enough of us to ensure a good spread across all eleven.

The main hall had videos playing on the big screen as people were milling about and getting sorted before the 11:30 start. The Tower Hamlets story was particularly impressive for its focus on uniting the local community, the local workers and their trade unions with the staff fighting for their jobs at the college itself. There was also a video showing our own ongoing dispute with coverage of, and interviews from, the Manchester pickets and the recent visit to lobby parliament.

Following some minor microphone technical difficulties, an event wouldn't be complete without them after all, the conference kicked off about 11:40 with the opening session, "We Won't Pay For Their Crisis" chaired by our very own Ian Allinson. (I should emphasise that the hall was packed. My photos probably don't show it but an estimated 850 people had turned up for an event anticipating around 500. There were people sat on the floor at the front, people sat on the stage behind the speakers and people standing throughout due to a lack of seats.) Mark Smith spoke about the Vestas occupation, their ongoing campaign and the impact it has had on the Isle of Wight. Clara Osagiede explained the difficulties facing the RMT cleaners in their fight to organise for better pay and conditions in the face of an employer determined to union-bust. Pete Murray of the NUJ highlighted the impact of media manipulation by the government and the bosses through reduced resources and an over-reliance on 'official' press releases and how it affects the flow of accurate information to the wider population. Kevin Courtney, the NUT DGS, spoke of the cheapening of education and why it isn't in the ruling class's interest to have an educated workforce ("They ask questions and challenge"). Tony Kearns, senior DGS for the CWU, expressed his desire to have the anti-trade union laws repealed in no uncertain terms. All the speakers were well received and all had something different to offer.

The volume of attendees meant that the workshops had to be split across the Central Hall rooms and the Mechanics Institute a 10 minute walk away. The short break following the opening session allowed me to get across to the MI for the "After BA, defying the anti-union laws" workshop held in the, very apt, Peterloo room. Paul Brandon, London bus driver and editor of the Busworker, chaired the workshop highlighting this particularly greasy character for his role in getting workers actions overturned in the courts on technicalities. There were also contributions from Linda Bartle, a former Visteon occupier, and Charlie Kimber of the SWP. The workshop was then opened to the floor (approx 80 attendees) and contributions centered on the need for organisation to be built from the bottom up, for workers to have confidence in their ability to defy legal threats from both companies facing action and their own unions in many cases and the need for existing networks of activists to be prepared to support each other's campaigns. Unite in particular took a kicking for its lack of commitment to democratically called action in the face of legal challenges - hence the "After BA..".

It was another short walk back to the central hall, during which I was able to eat my lunch and have a fag, for the closing session. I was pleased to listen to Dot Gibson of the National Pensioners Convention as she emphasised that fights they were having now may save the audience having them in 10/20/30/40 years time. Dave Chapple of the National Shop Stewards Network spoke without the aid of a microphone which was impressive in itself but I was particularly caught by his references to Left parties treading on each other's toes and generally arguing over trivialities. Again, his emphasis was not to get bogged down but to support each other and I can go along with that. Richard McEwan, Tower Hamlets College UCU, outlined how their action (which I have referred to above) couldn't have taken place or been victorious without the support of the community and the local workers and union reps. Dietmar Meister of the University of Vienna explained how attacks on education in Austria are being fought through student occupations and solidarity with other workers under threat. Lydia Besong, an Anti Deportation Campaigner, thanked conference for their support and explained the untenable situation that many immigrants find themselves in - unable to legally work while their status is indeterminate, underpaid and exploited when they work illegally and subsequently scapegoated by some particularly undesirable elements. There were short contributions from the floor followed by a unanimous vote passing the statement.

Given that I am not a member of any Far Left party, and there were probably too many to count, I was encouraged by the the focus on grass roots activism coupled with building the necessary support networks with whoever and the lack of political posturing was very welcome (although one of my work colleagues indicated that the "How can workers get a real political voice?" workshop was just that - posturing). But all in all, a good day.

Zig Zag Mar 1984 - Test Department, F1 Electric & Holger Hiller

If Voting Changed Anything...

Couldn't resist the temptation to do another one of these. Especially after MutualAide reminded me of the Emma Goldman quote via Twitter. (I knew it would be good for something)

Aztec Camera & Mick Jones - Good Morning Britain (Single)

I am not sure whether it was drummed into me repeatedly from birth but I am of the opinion that no one human being, with few exceptions, is any better, or worse, than any other.

I believe that the vast majority of working people merely wish to live their lives, to the best of their ability, free from interference.

I don't believe that all white supremacists are fascists, I don't believe that all Muslims want to impose Sharia law, I don't believe that all Jews are rich, I don't believe that all blacks are gangsters, I don't believe that all coppers are crooked, I don't believe that all lesbians hate men, I don't believe that all teenagers are knife wielding hoodies.... you can see where I am going with this I hope.

Stereotypes seek to divide what I would regard as a global humanity. Sure we might believe different things, be different colours and all the rest but that does not make any race, creed or colour any better, or worse, than the rest.

I do believe in an individuals right to self determination but that right does not extend to imposition upon others. For instance, I, fully aware of the risks, choose to smoke but I choose not to smoke where that action imposes upon others (unless they too are smoking or have given their consent).

I do not believe that the ruling class has any such right to rule nor that capitalists have any right to profit from another's labour.

The most recent example of the hypocrisy of the state, whereby 'it' defines what is and is not allowed, was summed up in the expenses scandal. The state ran an advertising campaign targeting 'benefit cheats' while MPs were, at the same time, fiddling their expenses. What made their behaviour any different and why should I abide by laws drawn up by hypocrites?

I also believe that we have a collective responsibility both to others and to the planet. Despite what many would have you believe, humanity has a tendency to mutual aid. That is only natural given our status as social beings and our inherent concern for others. If we did not then why do people give to charity? Why do people do volunteer work? And we can't work against the planet lest we destroy ourselves in the process.

I suppose it is primarily for those reasons that I would define my political beliefs as anarchist communist. Read the booklet and see what you think.


Aztec Camera and Mick Jones - Good Morning Britain (Single) (WEA YZ521 1990) 320kbps

1. Good Morning Britain
2. Good Morning Britain (Live at Glasgow Barrowlands)

Good Night Britain - pwd: c4ctusm0uth

Zig Zag Sep 1984 - Singles, Chatshow, Kasai Chant, Heza Sheza & The Boothill Foot Tappers

Suicide In The Trenches

Suicide In The Trenches I knew a simple soldier boy Who grinned at life in empty joy, Slept soundly through the lonesome dark, And whistled early with the lark. In winter trenches, cowed and glum, With crumps and lice and lack of rum, He put a bullet through his brain. No one spoke of him again. You smug-faced crowds with kindling eye Who cheer when soldier lads march by, Sneak home and pray you'll never know The hell where youth and laughter go. Siegfried Sassoon

Airbrushed For Fuck All

My own small contribution to the ongoing mania that is 'Airbrushed For Change - My David Cameron'.

Altered States - Is Anyone Out There? (CD)

Anarchists will often argue that the media is little more than the propaganda wing of the ruling class.

This can be no more evident than in the complete absence of discussion surrounding alternatives to capitalism or the perpetuation of references to the 'middle-class'.

And so it is that Gordon Brown has given a speech, dutifully reported on by the (state owned) BBC, in which he refers to creating "more middle class jobs than ever before". He went on to say that social mobility would be Labour's "theme for the coming election and the coming Parliamentary term".

It needs to be borne in mind that the income gap under Labour has widened to it's highest level since records began in the 1960s. Couple that with the abject failure of Labour to make an impact on their much touted promise to reduce child poverty and I think we can see that Gordon's words amount to little more than empty rhetoric.

However this doesn't prevent Gordon from planting his foot firmly between his teeth and coming out with this gem: "A fair society is one where everyone who works hard and plays by the rules has a chance to fulfil their dreams whether that's owning a bigger house, taking a holiday abroad, buying a new car or starting a small business"

That one statement alone is so riddled with hypocrisy that I am surprised his audience didn't burst into hysterics.

"everyone who works hard" - The working class have always worked hard. We've had to. We make absolutely everything whilst carrying the unbridled weight of the parasitic ruling class on our backs.

"plays by the rules" - Aaahh, like those MPs who play by the rules whilst fiddling everything from cash for honours to their own expenses. Yes Gordon, very fair - if you are in a position of power.

"bigger house, taking a holiday abroad, buying a new car" - Whilst these may be perfectly reasonable aspirational items, his speech completely disregards the environmental impact of our ongoing uber-consumption.

Let's be absolutely clear. Gordon Brown, like all politicians, is concerned with nothing other than the retention of power for the state and the ruling class. If he has to lie to do it then he will. The Tories will join in the charade safe in the knowledge that their interests are, ultimately, the same as his. They may indulge in some critical sabre rattling but their concerns are not ours.

I submitted the following comment in response to the BBC's "What did you think of Gordon's speech?" -

Strange that Gordon is trying to appeal to a group of people who don't actually exist - that is, the "middle class". If you HAVE to work for a living, and can not afford to live off share ownership/property/inherited wealth/etc, then you are WORKING CLASS irrespective of your income bracket. Labour, Tories and Lib Dems are all the same and NONE of them represent the working class.

I'm not holding my breath in anticipation of its publication. After all, why would the BBC challenge the status quo and thus their own existence?


Altered States on this recording comprised:

Yig Hughes - vocals & guitar
Rob Ryan - bass
Martin Winbury - drums

and if you look carefully you can see Yig's signature on the cover. Enjoy.

Altered States - Is Anyone Out There? (The Primary Recording Company PRC31 1994) 320kbps

1. Twin Obession
2. Is Anyone Out There?
3. What Is Left?
4. Everything
5. Them
6. They Wouldn't Listen
7. Drowning Children
8. Cathy
9. Those Voices
10. Low Life
11. What's The Matter With Lucy?
12. Walls & Fences
13. Final Chapter

Alters Nothing - pwd: c4ctusm0uth

Imaginary Conversation At B&Q

"Hello, can I help you Sir?"
"Yes. I'd like to buy some garden hose and some gaffer tape please?"
"Certainly Sir. Just along here. Is it a specific type of hose you are after?"
"No, thanks. Just ordinary garden hose should do the trick."
"OK. Any specific length?"
"No. I would reckon a maximum of 3 meters should do the trick."
"3 meters? You aren't going to get much of your garden watered with that."
"It's not for my garden."
"Riiigghht. Well 3 meters seems a bit short. Can I ask what it is for?"
"Yes. I am pretty sure you can ask."
"Oh, it's like that. Well then, what is it for?"
"Well, it only needs to reach from my car exhaust to the car window. With a bit left over."
"Huh?"
"From the exhaust to the window. Can't be much more than 3 meters. I only have a small car."
"I see. Dare I ask what the gaffer tape is for?"
"Dare you? That's the question."
"What's the gaffer tape for?"
"To seal the joints between the exhaust, the hose and the window."
"Planning on gassing ourselves are we Sir?" (laughs)
"I don't know about you but yes, that is exactly what I plan to do."
"Shit."
"Is that a problem?"
"Well, no," (flusters) "But the shortest length we have is 15 meters."
"Hmmm. I only need 3 meters. Can you cut it?"
"Errrr. I'd have to ask the manager." (flusters again)
"OK. See what he says. What about the gaffer tape?"
"It's right here. We do different colours and lengths - starting at 10 metres silver."
"I'll have the 25 meters silver please. It'll match the trim on the car."
"Are you kidding?"
"No."
"Oh, er, OK."
"You gonna see what the manager says about the hose then?"
"Yes, right away." (wanders off shaking head)

5 minutes pass before the sound of approaching sirens in the distance begins to get louder.

(raises eyebrows) "Fuck me. Can't even spend your own money and kill yourself without the fucking police getting involved."